Yesterday was a heavy adulting day. Among other activities, I went to Walmart and bought a bunch of stuff that I never would have thought of buying as a self-centered teenager, such as printer ink. Nobody likes spending money on that! And medical supplies for my daughter that aren’t covered by insurance. I also bought vitamins , hair dye and light bulbs and birdseed and handsoap , things we need, well maybe not the birdseed, but things that aren’t really fun.

Welcome to adulthood. Here’s the grocery list.

Kids love to buy things. I remember when I first started earning my own money doing chores and how fun it was to spend it at the local TG&Y store on little notebooks and pens, or at the UTOTEM on candy. Then I started babysitting and earning the big bucks and saved up and bought a brand new Kawasaki 100 dirtbike that I rode all over the bayou trails of Southwest Houston.

After that I graduated to getting a real paycheck at my first minimum wage job at McDonald’s and I bought clothes at the mall and I put my quarters into arcade games and paid for fast food.

In those days I didn’t get paid much . I started babysitting at age 11 and usually got paid $1 an hour , with occasional bonuses for extra kids. Later I made $15 a week helping my mom clean house and watch my sister after school. And then I earned $3 an hour at McDonald’s. I remember how exciting it was when I moved up to $4.25 an hour in a later job.

But it was okay because prices were much lower . My first car, a new 1981 (I think) Mazda GLC, cost around $17k, if I recall correctly. My parents helped with that but I was supposed to make the payments.

I had a passbook savings account at the local savings and loan bank from the time I started babysitting . I literally wrote the deposits and withdrawals into a paper booklet . But I wasn’t very good at earning or saving. I liked spending better. I didn’t think long term at all.

Childhood money habits

My parents didn’t have a lot of money, they survived , but they also didn’t have great money skills. Although they were “middle class” (70s version) my dad left my mom with debt when he died suddenly at 63, which was partly due to an unfortunate business decision, to be fair. My mom worked hard at a pretty good job, but she has no savings now or retirement, all spent keeping a certain standard of living which became a lot more difficult in the last two decades. My parents probably tried to teach me and they did the best they knew how, but it was not enough to prevent financial problems .

Edited to add: I’m not blaming my parents for my poor decisions. I’m just demonstrating how financial problems ran in my family. And to be honest, I was pretty spoiled . I did learn a lot of important things from my mom and dad, like how to cook and the value of family . My dad imparted a love of people and God. My mom showed me faith and self-lessness.

It’s not their fault that I didn’t assimilate the important financial principles of paying yourself first and paying cash. Back then my mom didn’t make me pay for my own school clothes or toiletries and we didn’t have cell phones, so I didn’t have to “pay my own way” from a young age like some people. I did start paying for some of my own expenses, but my parents mostly supported me in every way, even after I graduated from high school .

Like many people I didn’t learn the value of self discipline and the satisfaction you get from working towards a goal until later in life, and becoming a marathon runner helped with that. I got department store credit cards in college and I lived above my means and my parents enabled me to do so by bailing me out when I ran out of money . This didn’t help me when I got married and continued to try to live above our means. We ended up deep in credit card debt.

Changing my ways

Fast forward to the present and I’m currently working hard to pay off debt while building savings and investing. I know, I’m a little late, but better late than never!

My point is that poor and working middle class (and even rich) people can have poor money habits that they pass them down to their children. I’m talking about people who earn money but don’t use it wisely, not people who have financial problems for other reasons. People have to be taught how to use money wisely as a tool and to be good stewards of it. They have to learn money skills from a young age or they’ll be in debt by the time they’re 20 from using credit instead of learning to budget and save and invest . They probably won’t like it when you don’t just give them money , but they’ll thank you later.

If you have bad money habits, there’s a good chance they will, too. So work on yourself first so you can teach them. It can seem impossible if you’re already struggling financially , but many people have been able to improve with hard work and determination. Remember, if you don’t change your mindset and your habits, your life won’t change.

Here are a few tips.

1. Pay Yourself First: Save a portion of your income before spending on anything else.

2. Track Your Expenses: Know where your money is going to identify spending patterns.

3. Create and Stick to a Budget: Plan monthly spending and adjust as needed.

4. Build an Emergency Fund: Save 3-6 months of living expenses for unexpected events.

5. Avoid High-Interest Debt: Pay off credit card balances in full each month.

6. Invest Regularly: Contribute consistently to retirement accounts or other investments.

7. Live Below Your Means: Spend less than you earn to build wealth over time.

8. Automate Savings and Investments: Set up automatic transfers to ensure consistency.

9. Plan for Large Expenses: Save in advance for big purchases to avoid debt.

10. Educate Yourself Financially: Stay informed about personal finance and investment strategies.

From a Christian perspective, wise money management is a way of obeying God. Money can easily become an idol or you can develop an addiction to spending it to make yourself feel good. If you have those issues, it will hurt your faith and testimony.

What do you think? Did your parents teach money skills explicitly and by example ? Share some advice for others.