A few years ago, it may be five years ago now, I lose track of time, I realized that I wasn’t very good at worshipping God. I thought I knew God and had a ‘relationship with Him’, but our relationship was distorted by painful experiences in my past. I enjoyed singing and I loved sermons, but the word ‘worship’ made me uncomfortable. What did it even mean? Was I doing it right? Was I just having an emotional reaction to the music?

Long story short, God did a work in my heart and the more I sought to learn how to worship Him and love Him the way I knew in my “head” that I should, the more He enabled me to truly want to worship and love Him that way.

My lack of faith stemmed from a mixture of pride, a very primal fear that kept me needing to be in control, and an incomplete understanding of God’s nature. Somehow I was managing to think “I got this!” while also being completely terrified that my world was going to fall apart at any minute. I had compartmentalized my ‘faith’ into spiritual things and practical things.

I was confused about applying the gospel to my daily life and I find that this is a very common problem. In our eagerness to teach people that we are saved by faith alone, we can deemphasize the verses where the disciples left everything to be Jesus’ disciple. Some churches forget to mention the verses about living by the Spirit. Jesus said,

⁴ Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.

⁵ “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. ⁶ If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. ⁷ If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you^[a] will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. ⁸ By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples.

⁹ “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. ¹⁰ If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love.

Abiding in Jesus means that we constantly seek God’s will in prayer and live by faith. Notice all the good things that come when we abide! We can’t bear fruit for God unless we abide in Jesus. The people to whom God will say “I never knew you!” in Matthew 7:21 are people who tried to use Jesus’ name to get into heaven. They may have done some religious things in their own power, but they never were a child of God and therefore did not abide in him. We cannot do anything good apart from God.

Jesus said to “Follow me.”. That means not only to live by his commandments, but to submit to his authority over our lives. I was trying to follow the rules without submitting my WILL to God. I still wanted my own way. Submission to God goes against our human nature, and it can feel scary to be so vulnerable! But it is is KEY to true peace. But equally important is understanding that God wants us to submit for our own good! Not because HE is a control freak, but because His will is always best. “Thy will be done!” I started praying the Lord’s prayer and really meaning it.

I finally understood that just like He was able to save me from hell, God is also willing and able to help me in my daily life and relationships and work and when I feel lonely or rejected or angry or anytime. I was embarrassed at my lack of self-awareness of being such a control freak, but thankful that God revealed this sin in my life. And He continues to prove to me daily that I CAN trust Him with every detail.

Our God is full of mercy and grace, and He is patient! He will give you time to figure it out if you really want to. So if you believe in Jesus, but you still struggle with guilt, shame, temptation, doubts, a lack of love, or a need to be in control of your life, you probably need to ask God to help you let go of any sins that are keeping you from fully submitting to His authority and trusting in His goodness. Ask him to show you if you are laboring under lies or false beliefs.

Knowing God enabled me to love Him and then I discovered that I could worship Him with my whole heart. Love inspires worship. What is worship? Worship can be prayer, singing, dancing, or simply sitting with God with your heart open to Him expressing your love for Him.

So if you have trouble worshipping God, you might need to ask God if there is something blocking your love for Him, like fear or misunderstanding of who He is . God is not waiting for you to mess up so He can strike you down! He wants what’s best for you. He is your loving and good Father. You can trust Him with your whole heart.

Warning: beware of false teachers. The minute you start to trust God, Satan will send legalistic or progressive or cultish teachings your way. The faith versus works argument is always raging on the internet, in churches, and even in your head. Humans are naturally bent towards performing for rewards. You must compare everything to the whole teaching of Scripture (and not ‘new revelations’) and to the general message of the Bible. The Old and New Testament Scriptures reveal God’s goodness and power and patience and desire for us to seek Him and be reconciled. First trust that God is willing and able to save you. Then demonstrate your faith by living a life in submission to his authority. Don’t misunderstand this. The submission part is a gift, not a burden! When we stop trying to have things our way, we will no longer be resisting God’s will for our lives. But rest in this truth, We are saved by faith, not by works, so don’t live in fear of losing your salvation.